“I miss you every single day and wonder if it is the same with you?”- words of a film song so tenderly caressing my heart……
Does anybody miss each other? If he is so close to me, why didn’t he miss me as I missed him? How could he stay away from me for such a long time? Those loving eyes and the feathery soft touch so endearing to me and the melodious raga arising from the sitar strings of my heart whenever he holds me close to his heart……
“Happy Birthday to you dear Abhi ! ”-when the door was opened by Abhijeet, he was surprised to see me and my friend Madhu. “I am thankful that you could make it to come for my birthday. For a lonely person like me, it gives immense pleasure to think that I am being cared for!” – He offered sweets to us and gracefully accepted my birthday gift.
It was a relationship developed quite unknowingly and unexpectedly- I was thinking about Abhijeet. I was always longing for the love of a younger brother and he also liked to have a sister. So it was a beautiful coincidence so as to say ! Rakhi was tied on his wrist by me establishing the loving bond of brother and sister.
I tried to recollect that memorable evening when Abhi came to our house, he was warmly welcomed by my husband (I call my husband Unniyettan, giving respect to him since he is four years elder to me).My husband is always so loving and understanding – a gem of a person to have for a husband! I wonder sometimes that I must have done some good deed in my previous birth to get an affectionate life partner like him. He never likes to send me alone to the hill station where I work.
“Since I could not come with you and Abhi is also going towards that side, why don’t you go with him?” – My husband suggested. I was totally surprised.
“Now, don’t look so shocked! – I know, that young man is reliable and he will take care of you” – My mind’s dilemma was solved and we were happily seen off by my family.
A pleasant winter evening with a cool breeze… Dark shadows of trees were drawing beautiful designs on the lonely road …. The sky looked like a bride blushing profusely. After the initial euphoria was over, my mind was again perplexed with so many questions.
Was I right in the decision to come along with a young man whom I hardly know? I don’t even know whether he is really sincere or not. He is a stranger. What will he think of me? And what if the society blames me ?
“ A married woman travelling all alone with a bachelor ? There has to be something …. How could the husband allow his wife to go along with a bachelor?” – I shuddered to hear those criticisms in my imagination.
“Nothing to worry. I am with you” – It was Unniyettan whispering in my ears.
“Nandini, come on tell me, what are you thinking about?” – Abhi was smiling at me. Just to hide the embarrassment, I started discussing about the songs – those romantic songs flowing from the car stereo and creating waves in the still lake of my mind! Full moon smiling from the clear azure blue sky ….. White veil-like clouds enveloping the blue hills like a lover’s embrace ….. The soft touch of breeze kissing my cheeks … I was in my little dream world (Were you with me?)
“Eyes of heart? What is the meaning of this title? “– I asked Abhi indicating one of his favourite audio cassettes.
“Yes Nandu, Eyes of heart ! You see, heart does have eyes, doesn’t it ? Otherwise how could we know each other’s feelings? I don’t have to tell you anything. It’s all in the heart, isn’t it so?” – was I dreaming or was it a reality? How come he is here, so close to me?
“I will love you till the end of time ….. you are my dream come true …” Those petal like lips fondly caressing my lips and eyes … The gentle feather- like touch still haunting my memories … Those deep eloquent eyes speaking to me in the silent language of love ….. I was thinking about those stolen moments of mine …..
“Life is made up of moments and it is for these moments that we give our lives! “ The little girl in me who cherishes those precious moments …. like a peacock feather or the sight of a rainbow!
I remembered him comparing my smile in tears to the rainbow appearing along with drizzling rains … those blue mountains and green lawns giving solace to my heart ….
“Nandu, you know? This is my idea of relaxation … gazing at the mountains and the starry sky ……..It would be more romantic if there is a song coming from the distance … I am missing all the rains back home “ – He wrote to me- “Of course I miss you darling, I am crazy about you. Don’t you know that we are inseparable? “
“Nandini, Let’s go!” – I came back to the real world. Oh, Madhu was waiting so eagerly to get back to her home. I felt embarassed to think about my crazy mind, wandering like a lover, in the dream world.
“Thanks a lot for the lovely evening” – I told Abhijeet and we got up.
“It’s getting late, Abhi, why don’t you push off now? It will be late night when you reach home” – I suggested as I was worried for his safety.
“So what? It is nice to drive late in the evening – but only if you have the pleasant company of somebody …. Otherwise the long drive will be so dull and boring.You remember, that day ….?”
My eyes told his eyes not to explain further. Let it be a secret, isn’t it, Abhi? (Just like my own feelings and thoughts which won’t be revealed to a second person!)
Let us keep our little secrets to ourselves and cherish those memories forever, isn’t it?