Recently, a friend called me and greeted me. Conversations last for hours instead of the old-fashioned way of saying too much in the shortest amount of time. Jobs, earning money, children were busy, and so many relationships were abandoned. The existing ones were limited to formal interactions. He said that now that he is retired, there is time and it is an attempt to bring back the lost relationships. Reminder that "I can call even if I do not be called, because you are always busy. If you need anything, do not hesitate to call, I'm here". I closed my eyes, frightened by the magnitude and number of distances I am in.
The only thought was to go to the Persian Gulf and get a job somehow after learning the essentials in the seventies and eighties when no other means were proven. There were lot of unanswered tests like railway test, bank test. There did not seem to be a clutch there. Youth then were tired of answering the question of what's next, from kith and kin. Then work from the bottom of the list eliminating issues that aren't worth the fight. This was the problem that was affecting the generation at one time. Once a job is offered, dreams of a return to life give meaning and hope. So, despite the boredom and ridicule of the North Indians or the Arabs, a return is inevitable. It was another situation for the Malayalees when they migrated to America with their relatives, but after a few years the number of those who did not dream of a return will decrease. He had an insane passion for something he had for in the land of coconuts.
Unknowingly, our family, parents, siblings, country, country, beliefs, color, language, customs, etc., which we reach as a mission, make us realize that we are the ones who cannot be transplanted into our lives like the spots of a tiger skin. The pain and anxiety of losing all of this and being snatched away from us is a reminder that we are human. Each relationship is strengthened by the hands we hold, the freedoms, and the expectations.
It is the pulse of the Spirit that holds us back on earth to return to them. Although practical life teaches us how to slowly sever ties and weave new ones, the truth is that the seeds of something unspeakable haunt us until our last breath. The pulse of existence is the energy that nature excites in us every moment, so that it reaches somewhere we do not know, and some of the immortal reminders that follow us unknowingly, their vague mysteries, vibrations, and waves are constantly interacting with us.
Why go home? No one was waiting for me there, I just remember sitting in the armchair all night with my mother asleep, having a brother barely seen for a day or two like a bounty, they were always in a big hurry, some old friends who came in occasionally with a laugh, ran over with charity collections of churchgoers. The children, they and their lives went through many stages. There are no close relatives to speak of here, only the sick wife and I. At first I did a lot of traveling and now I am tired of it too. "In this old house where the ship was built with the flower of memories, me and I shared the boredom" So many repetitions !!. It seems now that he did not need a pension so early. A friend who was an early immigrant to the United States was mourning. A friend who is tired and worried that he will never go home, unknowingly sighs at being caught up in private friendly conversations.
Why stretch so much and give life, it's cruel, can you not call? Was such an empty stretch necessary for the wife, who was struggling to look after her 95-year-old husband, to fly through a lot of unforgettable experiences? The question is looking up? Who should answer? Did it take so long? What is the result of total gain ?.
Sebastian Junger's book, Tribe - Returns and Returns, unveiled another facet of life. We want to flee to safe and prosperous pastures. But Sebastian Junger reminds us that this is the purpose of life. What awaits returns and reunions? He is pointing the finger at what. This includes situations where soldiers are expected to return after the war. Beneath a military unit that comes with a tribal character, a mob that is isolated at the fingertips of those who fought together regardless of religion, politics, or color, face the dilemma of return, possession and non-possession, contempt, hatred, native, foreign, and so on. We have a strong instinct to belong to small groups defined by a clear goal and understanding - "tribes." In modern society this tribal connection is almost lost, but regaining it may be the key to our mental survival.
Junger says it is only when adversity and adversity haunt us that we begin to realize the endless consumer goods that modern culture offers, the unimaginable individual liberties, and the invaluable social awareness and interdependence that we lose somewhere in between. In the seventeenth century, the American colonies and the American tribes were at war. It was common for the colonists to abduct American-Indians and for them to repatriate the colonists. But what is unique is that it is still a subject of study for the anthropological world. Those raised in the abducted European culture are mentally prepared to adapt to that way of life in the American-Indian tribal region itself. When the colonists came and tried to free them, they tried to hide without returning. But not a single abducted American-Indian tried to imitate European methods. It was recorded in 1753 by Benjamin Franklin.
No wonder even King Solomon began to think that we could go to the villages and spend the night. Apart from the pseudo-security extended by civilization, the culture of being able to know each other, of knowing the neighbor's name, of the sense that a group is still behind oneself, gives a particular sense of satisfaction and peace, and we are pushing for a tribal culture that is conducive to this. Modern movements offer only service, and we have lost somewhere the great humanity of "reserve." Religion and government offer only mere "service," and they will be rewarded accordingly. But "cares" are free, and it is a reflection of the unconscious exchange of minds, which is what we have lost today. That is what we need to go back to, and we need to go to the free tent.
Today, no one has the ambition to go back home and get back to his old days. Then I can go back to that old mindset, where my childhood, adolescence and youth were wrapped up in a closet. Let's open it up, it can only be seen in a new perspective. The realization that even the dust of our old village is no more is a nuisance.
“Humans don’t mind hardship, in fact they thrive on it; what they mind is not feeling necessary. Modern society has perfected the art of making people not feel necessary. It's time for that to end.” ― Sebastian Junger.